The Waiting Room

Flesh and bone and spirit. Strong from years of toughing it out and dealing with the pain. Dealing with doctors. Waiting rooms. Living with it. Living with knowing that you have a medical issue. That the doctors can only slow the process. You must wake up and know that things will get better. You must wake up and know that the end is not near. That things will get better even if realistically they won't.

Realism is not acceptable here.

Believe in science. Believe in the progression of new technologies.
Believe in stem cells and nanobots. In miracles. Believe in science fiction.
Believe in science faction.

There is the glimmer of hope that something will take and ten years from now a cure will be found. But never give up. We all know someone who lives with a medical issue. We all hope that their issue will be resolved. Rarely do we think that the end is near or what if it gets worse? We rarely believe that the issue is real until the end is near. Hold on to that hope. Hold on to the What Ifs.

What if it's not as bad as the doctors say it is?
What if it's not really as bad as I think it is?
What if science finds a cure tomorrow?
What if I will learn what I can while I am here and make the most of it?
What if it is all just a test?

What if I just live each day to the fullest regardless?

What if?

First Order Logic

Value semiotics. Lexical linguistics. Acrolect ritual rites of passage puberty, weddings, menopause, and death. The liminality of the social class occupation is disambiguation. Parsing Programming languages and Data structures into one Algorithm is of further consideration. A Bachelor's degree in first order logic is undecidable if any quantification or uniqueness quantification would be desirable.

Because I am attempting to formalise the notion of something being true.

Attempting to formalise the notion of the me and you. Seeing the structure and all it's housing. Seeing the compact plastic shell of voided refunds and coupons collected attempting to save pennies and time. Time being now. Saving time. Saving me. Saving you.

In mathematics and logic, the phrase "there is one and only one" is associated with unique existence. There is one and only one, and that one is you.

The Daily Program

Work fosters growth through group collective. Amass wealth through buying into the company. Buying into this way of life. The believers know who they are. The believers know who you are. You are either one of ours, or you are one of theirs.

Group think leads decision protocols.

Write new program to run system without group queries. Identity protocol in question. Reboot operating system. There is a syntax that ends with the wrong if - then statement. The logic is construed.

• There will be a time when we all will wake up and realize that we do not know who we are.
• There will be a time when we all will wake up and realize that we do not need the group to maintain original thought.
• There will be a time when we will want something more from life than being force feed our identities by our daily programming.
• There will be a time when we see the wrongs in the world and we try to correct them.
• There will be a time when we repeat the error.
• There will be a time when it is too late to correct the program.

Scan disk in process. End program identifiers.

Cutting Strings

Invisible strings been holding things.
Together. Sinking ships a float, bloat and
swell, and blow holes in young talent's brains.
Drain union workers who died for 40 hours
a week. Expectations of our grandfather's
fathers burnt asunder for the almighty dollar
and dreams of making it big one day.

Invisible strings been holding us together,
dangling. Dangling mortgages, jobs, futures
choices controlled by an ignorant few. Who place
the moneys of the their few above the moneys of
their crew. Invisible strings can disappear and
then it will all unravel. Invisible strings been
stitching this thing together, but not forever.

This Time...

Cries through stucco walls. Cries of hunger. Milk pumped, pulse system, correct errors, immune system strengthens, fever burns. Blood. Crawling through carpet spills, spit up, drink, spit up. Grab glasses, groan, grunt, and moan. Life.

Time pulses. Pump evolution of story into bone, flesh, hair, grow with breath roll toys walk soon. Masterpiece of all things good and pure rolled up in you. Genetic make-up carry on life's seed, need this to go on. Thank you, for you. Thank you for giving us another chance. To do it right this time. To make sure you get what you need this time. To prove that we are worth-while this time.

We have made our mark with you. With your groans, moans, chrome dome skin pure fullness, of fruit of earth of all the potential of everything. When the time comes we will look back and we will see you. All the memories of you, and we will laugh with you, because you made it all come true, sweet pure child of mine. Sweet pure child this time.

Building a Village

(A young Army Private was once asked while standing in formation by his Drill Sergeant, "What is the hardest thing to find." The Private sounded off loudly, "To find happiness Drill Sergeant." The Drill Sergeant immediately called him a faggot and made him do push ups. The Drill Sergeant's answer was to be a leader. He was obviously insulted by the Private's answer. Strangely the whole formation didn't laugh at the Private's answer, as they were miserable and happiness seemed a distant dream in their current setting. As that Private came down the next morning for formation at 5:30 A.M. he noticed someone had written on the chalk board in the barracks front lobby, Happiness is Elusive. It seemed someone had been listening.)

Not knowing. Not knowing what the future holds. Where you will be tomorrow? Where you will live for the rest of your life? Wanting the best for your family. The best schools and social environment for your children. The least stressful environment for yourself and loved ones. Trying to surround yourself with family and friends that support you, love you and help you to grow mentally, spiritually, and creatively.

This should be easily attainable. You will need a village. A village where your friends and loved ones live. A village where your skills and talents are needed in order for the village to prosper. A village where you can find happiness without taking medication. Where you don't need a pill to level you out. A village that naturally levels you out.

Where you can depend on and trust your neighbors. A place where you don't have to lock your front door at night. A place where you aren't worried about your kids playing outside. A place where you aren't worried about retirement, because you know you will be supported and not abandoned.

Find this, and you will find happiness, Drill Sergeant. If you find this, then come find me. I will be the first to follow.